I spent so many years, 20 to be exact, raising him to be a good man, to make wise decisions, to be responsible. But somewhere along the way he decided to HATE ME for that. Can you imagine?? HATE ME!!!! 😞
i didn’t beat him, abuse him, or…whatever. I just called him out on his shit and rewarded him for good behavior. He has high functioning autism so I did everything I possibly could to get him as much help as possible with that not to mention changing the holy HELL out of my life to accommodate his needs.
But he’s been a fighter since he was born. He never wanted to learn a damn thing from me but my god, did he ruin his life in spite of me or WHAT??
I suppose I’ll cut right to it. My son moved out of my home at the age of 20 with an amazing full time
job with FULL benefits, he had a car, 2 bank accounts with plenty of money, he had furniture, plenty of nice clothes and a mom and stepdad who said, “if you need ANYTHING just let us know”. Btw, he moved out cuz he wanted to, not for any other reason.
Four months later he knocked up his very first girlfriend, after losing his job, his apartment, his car, his bank accounts and took up drinking, vaping and smoking pot.
WTF DID HE LEARN IN 20 FUCKING YEARS????????????????!!!! Not a god damn thing. And IM the one who feels shame, embarrassment and sadness. Not him, apparently.
He refused to tell me his address because he didn’t want me to “track him down”. What???? He blocked me on social media, changed his phone number and that was that for MONTHS. I never did a single thing to prompt ANY of that.
You know how I learned about his girlfriends pregnancy?? One of his two best friends DIED. Drowned in the lake down the street and his OTHER best friend’s mom called me to see if my son had a decent outfit to wear to the funeral. Apparently they had been in contact with my son, but not me!
Wow. Just, wow.
My son finally texted me after this unfortunate event. (For the record, he did NOT attend the funeral. He bailed. It was his best fucking friend!!!!!!!) Anyway, it was then that he gave me his address and phone number. But he still didnt want me to interfered in his life. He didn’t necessarily say this, but honestly, he didn’t say much at all. I took the hint. 😞
I've asked him several times what the sex and the due date was for the baby. Only today he sent me a video of a gender reveal party (that I wasn’t invited to) that showed the baby is a girl.
Great. 🙄
I mean, who cares? He clearly doesn’t want anything to do with me and he clearly doesn’t want me to have anything to do with his child. (A child, btw, that he claimed for YEARS he never wanted.)
*heavy sigh*
The holidays are coming. My son’s birthday is coming up. What do I do?? Send him a gift? Do nothing? Text a happy whatever? What SHOULD I do??
😞
Im so angry. So upset. So ashamed.
😞
A huge part of me wants to shut him out and forget he ever existed. The mom in me just can’t.
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